All about Mothers Day (Part 4)

Of course ..

Mothers Day isn't just about me as a Mum.  I also have a Mum!  My Mum was 24 when I appeared on the scene.  Back then she laboured by herself in a sterile room, with people checking on her periodically.  But mostly by herself, and quietly.  She became a Mum on 1 October, and I spent a great deal of my life thinking I was a New Years Eve baby !!  It wasn't until I was pregnant myself 33 years later that I discovered I was in fact 3 weeks early!  (photo from 2007).

My Mum ..

brought my sister and I up mostly by herself.  At one point running 4 businesses, which she eventually sold.  In my youth I remember her strength and resourcefulness in creating our life.  She loved horses, and I rode also, and she helped me to buy my first horse when I was 12.

My Mum ..

has supported me in all my life choices over the years - some not so great!  She was always there when I needed her.  She created a peaceful life for herself on her dream lifestyle block, with her cats and horses.   She bred beautiful miniature horses which were one of her passions, as well as riding her goregous "Reffy" until it was time to say goodbye to her last riding horse.

I know ..

My Mum was thrilled when I returned from 10 years overseas to live back in Cambridge, where I hadn't lived since I'd left town when I was 18.  My oldest spent many weekends and school holidays with his Nana on her lifestyle block.  Such lovely memories for him, playing bowls down the stairs, and adventures in 'the secret garden'.

Then the day my Rainbow baby was born ..

was the day everything changed.  My Mum came from receiving her diagnosis of Alzheimers / Dementia, to meeting her new grandson.  Such an emtional day for her, and I didn't find out for a few days.  My Mum - still trying to protect me.

I love my Mum ..

and just over 4 years later, while she is still here, she now lives in a secure Dementia Unit.  I miss her.  I miss knowing my Mum is always there for me.  The world has tilted again, and now I am there for her.  I love the days her face lights up when we visit.  Not so much the days when tears fill her eyes, and she is sad, or confused for what has or is happening.  It is a very long grieving process, this disease, filled with periods of 'new normal', and periods of 'OMG this is so awful'.  At the moment everything is stable, and Mum is happy to see us, and we can enjoy our visits.  I still grieve the fact my little one never knew her, as my oldest did, and misses all those amazing times with her.  But he has different memories, and thinks of the Unit as 'Nanas house' and it is normal for him.  

Treasure your Mum ..

You only get one.  And you never know how long for.